Nice Girls Vs Nice Guys

What constitutes nice? and why is that always a trait that people say they are looking for? Most people don’t want nice, they want someone with a dramatic flair or at least someone who will push back when they are backed up against a wall. So why the term; nice?

The concept of a nice girl is always the same; she cooks, she cleans, she keeps up a home and is good to her man but what about herself? Should she look a certain way or is being nice/good a reflective of your domestic capabilities entirely? I know of girls that are nice but they get played because they are two nice then they become a bitch and then they get dogged even harder for being a bitch. It’s a cycle.

And it works both ways.  The saying is that nice guys finish last and again what is a nice guy; it’s all about actions versus the personality/character/value traits.  Nice guys open doors, they buy you jewelry, they pick up the phone when you call them in the middle of the night but they never get any play because you’re the perfect girl for them but you’re stuck in a relationship with an asshole who you think you can change if you love him hard enough. Nice guy gets tired of seeing the asshole win and becomes the bitter asshole…he finds a nice girl and the cycle from paragraph two starts all over again.

So we’ve established that it’s a cycle…its like an alcoholic admitting that they do have a drinking problem.

Nice Guy / Nice Girl 12 step program?


6 Comments Add yours

  1. Someone once told me I’m too nice. I couldn’t understand it. What’s wrong with nice?! Today I don’t want to be nice anymore. And I don’t want a nice girl. I want to be real and I want to be in relationship with someone who is real. But real with love and compassion and understanding and joy and sacrifice and commitment and fun and adventure.

    1. angirach says:

      There’s nothing wrong with nice, as long as you’re being nice because that’s you and not your way of impressing someone; that’s awesome. Don’t stop being who you are. Finding a good partner is difficult but don’t get side tracked by the rotten apples; there’s still some good women out there waiting for you. 🙂

      Nice and Real aren’t synonymous? Why does it have to be one or the other? That’s like saying a Christian can’t do bad things…ya know?

  2. there are different kinds of nice. the nice i am talking about is the sugar-coated, afraid of conflict, hypocritical kind of nice. the nice that i was and sometimes still tend to fall back into when i feel vulnerable. that kind of nice is not synonymous with real.
    the real nice is a deep, true goodness, gentleness, compassion – part of my real identity that i’m rediscovering and learning to embrace and that will soon blossom once again.

    1. angirach says:

      I’m not talking about that kind of nice. I’m talking about sane nice; the girl that will go out of her means to make you happy; keep a house, entertain your friends, protect your heart. Not the girl that is shy and introverted and is using you as a way to break out of her shell.

      True compassion, understanding and a loving heart is what I’m talking about.

  3. vankailey says:

    As a girl with a few extra pound on her, I find that “nice” (in the 15-30 male range) also includes being thin, well dressed and having a load of spare time to spend on their man. As a girl focused on her goals and career, I tend to intimidate guys because I refuse to drop everything for them and I have a mind of my own. I have yet to find a guy who I feel is equally driven, kind, thoughtful and fun. Not that I am wasting time hunting around for them…

    1. angirach says:

      Most guys who think they are the (pardon my language) ” the shit ” have irrealistic expectations so they either go for the trophy or the shy cling-on because they need that constant reassurance that they are the shit. These are normally the guys that are completely selfish and egotistical as well.

      Finding someone that is driven, not jealous and not a clingon who wants you to change your entire life for them while they sit on their ass and use the excuse of “this is how I am” is hard. I wish you the best of luck with your endeavors to find such a man. You will have to weed through a lot of bs first.

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